In Victorian times, “say it with flowers” was more than just a catchy advertising slogan.

Flowers actually were used to say what couldn’t be said out loud.

A lesson in floriography — the language of flowers — was among Saturday’s Tapestry events. The Victorian art of choosing and arranging flowers to express an emotion or convey a message often used a small bouquet called a tussie-mussie, said Mary Lee, owner of Belle of the Bends, who gave the lesson and hosted a tour of her postbellum home.

“Tussie-mussies are known as the talking bouquet because all of the flowers used in them have a meaning,” Lee told eight guests at the home. “People were very prim and proper and did not express their emotions. Flowers were a way to do this, because people knew what they meant.”

Knowing when and how to use flowers to send a message was as important to Victorian gentility as being well dressed, she said.

Demonstrating, Lee quickly put together a tussie-mussie with a base of bay leaves, which means strength; a single white camellia, which means “you’re adorable;” two azaleas, for color and to convey womanhood; and a single sprig of ivy to express affection and friendship — and perhaps test the waters for something more than friendship.

Victorian floral messages went both ways, Lee explained, the woman communicating her feelings by how she received the bouquet. If she accepted the tussie-mussie with her right hand, she was encouraging the gentleman that the relationship had a chance. If she took it with her left, he knew it meant “thanks, but no thanks,” Lee said.

Tussie-mussies are still used in England on ceremonial occasions. Six times a year, judges in certain courts enter the courtroom carrying small bouquets of herbs, a custom that originated when the judges walked through London and used them to ward off the stench of the streets.

Dressed in a hoop skirt, Lee talked about Victorian flower arranging on each of the last three Saturdays during Vicksburg’s Tapestry spring home tours and living history presentations. The first Saturday, March 14, she had about six visitors and 23 on the second Saturday.

All the flowers used came from the yard and gardens of Belle of the Bends, the Klein Street bed and breakfast inn Lee and her husband Dan purchased about five years ago. Besides camellias and azaleas, Lee used baby’s breath, roses, hydrangeas and other flowers, leaves and even bare rose stems.

“I use all parts of the flower,” she said, holding up arrangements with flowers, leaves and stems, as well as baskets of dried flower petals combined into potpourris.

Lee also showed off different containers for both fresh and dried arrangements, including Victorian silver fan vases and baskets, a teapot and an antique Limoges casserole dish missing a lid.

“It just shows how many arrangements you can make, varying them by the container, by the color, by the greenery,” she said.

Operating a bed and breakfast inn had been one of Mary Lee’s goals for more than 20 years, she told visitors during Saturday’s home tour that followed the floriography lesson. “I lived, ate, drank, slept and dreamed bed and breakfasts” hoping and waiting for the time to be right. Sept. 11, 2001 served as the catalyst to turn the dream into reality.

In Victorian times, Lee said, flowers “adorned everything” — embroidery, upholstery, crewel, tatting, wallpaper, all areas of the home. At Belle of the Bends, she has kept that tradition alive in the guest rooms and public areas of the mansion, which was built in 1876 by former Mississippi legislator Murray Smith.

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Contact Pamela Hitchins at phitchins@vicksburgpost.com.