Nothing worse than ‘the crud’
Published 6:12 pm Wednesday, February 28, 2018
I sit here in front of my computer with a stopped up head, scratchy throat and a nose running like a faucet.
I’m trying to come down with this year’s version of the crud.
I avoided what the doctors call “an upper respiratory infection” last year for the first time in ages, and was hoping to avoid an encounter for a second year.
No such luck.
It all began Sunday night with the inevitable sinus drain and scratchy throat. It led to the beginnings of the cough, the goose bumpy feeling like I had a fever when I didn’t and a slight chill. Tuesday night, it hit full force. I spent half my night sitting up coughing and the other half trying to breathe. I looked in the mirror after getting up Wednesday morning and looked like I’d been hit and rolled over by a truck.
I’ve had the flu, bronchitis, even pneumonia as a child, but nothing puts me down like the crud. With the other three maladies, you’re sick enough to go to and stay in bed; with the malady I’m suffering from now, you feel bad enough just to be miserable, but not bad enough to do what you should do, like go home and go to bed.
Instead, you drag yourself through the day, hacking and barking and making strange noises that have your co-workers looking at you and wondering, from your outward appearance, if they should call for an ambulance or a hearse. You talk to others who have had the same illness and they give you their wisdom and suggestions how to fight the problem, with some of the remedies involving something 80 proof or better.
And still dragging and seeking relief, you make an appointment the doctor, sit in a waiting room of people in the same condition as you, get in and get offered a shot (which I refuse — a needle thing) and some very good drugs that will help cure you of your problems. The only problem with the drugs is they make you drowsy, which isn’t a good thing when you’re trying to “tough it out” and continue to be a productive member of society.
In the old days, before I began adding gray hair, I would self-medicate. I would take all manner of decongestants, high-powered cough medication and suck on the strongest menthol cough drops I could find. In the early years of my career, I was fortunate to be able to go home for lunch. When I was in the condition I am now, I would go home, eat and then crash on the bed for about 30 minutes, go back to work and return home and collapse on the bed and sleep.
Now that I’m older, I can no longer take such measures; what worked in my 30s doesn’t work in my 60s.
So I accept my fate, suffer in silence and hope this problem doesn’t last too long. And pray I never get it again.
John Surratt is a staff writer for The Vicksburg Post. You may reach him at john.surratt@vicksburgpost.com