The curious case of the mysterious zucchini

Published 6:19 pm Wednesday, August 23, 2017

As I have discussed in the space before, I enjoy cooking.

My culinary dalliances have one major obstacle they must fight through though. I am, for the most part, not a fan of vegetables. You won’t find any peppers, onions, mushrooms or peas in my recipes or on my plate.

I do have a few I like though. Steam some asparagus in the microwave and yum (especially with some ranch) give me some carrots or a cucumber and I’ll eat them up like a rabbit. In the last couple years, I have also found that I like yellow squash and zucchini and frequently buy them and throw them on the George Foreman.

I mention this due to the strange occurrence I experienced Monday, which I have dubbed “The curious case of the mysterious zucchini.” 

I was low on a few important staple items in my kitchen and made a trek to Kroger’s after work. I had a small, but important shopping list that I think created a very balanced trip to the grocery store.

First on the list was tortillas so I could make a wrap for lunch the next day (I went with the small ones this time, yeah for less carbs), I needed gum to fulfill my afternoon gum habit at work (thanks to those in the office that let me mooch when I run out), a bag of cat food (the kitten is still alive, still bites and is overall pretty cool) and then I broke down and bought a bag of the Lays Fried Green Tomato chips (verdict is they are pretty good, also tomato flavored potatoes chips count as a fruit and vegetable right?) 

That is all I needed, and what I believed to be all that I bought.

Nothing I bought was cold, so when I got home there was no rush to put groceries away. The chips of course were opened quickly and snacked on while making dinner, but the rest of the groceries were left sitting on the table ignored for the time being.

Later that evening, before going to bed I decided to put the cat food away, so Tui wouldn’t find it. Then, I opened the bag with the tortillas and gum and found it.

Sitting there on top of my tortillas, not even wrapped in a plastic bag as is normal for produce was a single large zucchini.

This was not what I expected to find. I didn’t even go to the produce section while at Kroger. I even checked my receipt, no zucchini was listed.

So I did what any sane millennial would have done in that situation. I grabbed my phone, snapchated a picture of the zucchini and then put it in the fridge to be enjoyed at a later date.

If you were in front of me in line at Kroger and got home to find yourself a zucchini short, sorry I know where it is.

I can only fathom that this must have been a sign from the universe that my diet consisting of mostly proteins and carbs (see chicken and pasta) just wasn’t cutting it and I needed more vegetables. At least it was one I like and not a nasty onion or pepper.

So if anyone has a good zucchini recipe, I guess send it my way, because there is now a random one in my fridge.

Brandon O’Connor is a staff writer with The Vicksburg Post. You may reach him at brandon.oconnor@vicksburgpost.com.